Bloodhound Gang No Hard Feelings

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe you got screwed but i dumped you ’cause you ain’t nothin’ but trash

I put out despite the fact that you’re like a hawaiian punch moustache

Right under my nose thinking i’m so colonel klink oblivious

But how could i not see you got off scot-free ’cause i know this means it

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

If i want to be repeatedly shit on i’ll go make dutch porn

When roughly translated even your naked truth means squat and what’s more

I’m missing you like a hijacked flight on september 11th

I don’t know who got on you but i’m not wrong in thanking them since it

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday

Ain’t my job

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

Maybe it ain’t your birthday but then again

Ya know i wouldn’t give a fuck

When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now

I’m just gonna wrap it up

Maybe it ain’t your birthday but then again

Ya know i wouldn’t give a fuck

When what i shoulda got is over ya sooner so now

I’m just gonna wrap it up

Ain’t my job

I’m just gonna wrap it up

To fuck you on your birthday

I’m just gonna wrap it up

Ain’t my job

I’m just gonna wrap it up

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

I’m just gonna wrap it up

Ain’t my job

I’m just gonna wrap it up

To fuck you on your birthday

I’m just gonna wrap it up

Ain’t my job

I’m just gonna wrap it up

To fuck you on your birthday anymore

I’m just gonna wrap it up

[Four minute pause]

This is bam, and hidden track shit dicks out!

Bloodhound Gang We Are the Knuckleheads

Who’s The Knuckleheads?

We Are The Knuckleheads? [X4]

If You Would Be The Peanut Butter Then I Would Play The Jelly

I’ll Peel Apart Your Bread And Then I’ll Penetrate Your Belly

Your Blood Stains Mighty Bad I Wash It Off With Coast

Now I’ll Take My Jelly And Spread It On Your Toast

No One Rhymes Faster The Mic Is My Blaster

So Grasp Some Shasta The Mighty Mic Master

Giving Ya Communion With Your Lips On My Cup

Pump Pump Pump Pump Me Up

Now If You’re The Waterboy Then I’m The Heavyweight Contender

I’m Gonna Mix You All Up Like A Black And Decker Blender

If You Would Be The Telstar Then I’d Have To Be Defender

I’ll Be Out In Just Four Weeks I Was A First Offender

Your A Dumb Ass Stupid Vera And I’m The One That Flo Calls Mel

Puttin’ Holes Right Through Your Body Like Harvey Keitel

You’re A Broken Down Big Wheel I’m A Banana-Seated Schwinn

Take The Butt Of Your Gun And Smash Their Nose In Clip of Harvey Keitel from Reservoir Dogs

I’m A Lego-Eggo Maniac I’m Stickier Than Some Fun Tack

Trip To The Store And Get Another Six Pack

Bomb Dropping Like At Ground Zero

Like Colonel Klink Is Getting Fucked By Hogan’s Heroes

Eenie Meanie Miney Mo You Took Your Shot You Missed

I Wasn’t A Good Boy This Year I’m Not On Santa’s List

I Gave Your Girl Some Sausage And Than I Slit Your Wrists

Now I’m Taking Your Ass Out Like My Name Was Burgeous Meredith

Who’s The Knuckleheads?

We Are The Knuckleheads [X4]

Fast Fast Quick Bic Like Ass When Ya Pass Gas

You Threw It Like A Girl That’s Why You Got Picked Last

And Mr. Easy Does It Never Did It Now Did He

Jesus Is Coming So Look Busy

And You And Your Chumps Are Gonna Get Your Lumps

I Got The Goose That Laid The Golden Egg You Got Goose Bumps

Cause I’m Black Y’all, It’s A Fact Y’all

And If You Try To Take What’s Mine I’ll Take It Back Y’all

I Wish All Skinheads Smelled Like Mr. Clean

And That Girl From Jersey Really Was Nineteen

Cause The Whole Damn World Would Be Peachy Keen

With Rip Taylor On The Cover Of Every Magazine So Go

Rip Rip Rip Taylor

Rip Rip Rip Taylor

Rip Taylor Rip Taylor

Your Girlfriend

We Nailed Her

My Mom’s Got Opposable Thumbs

Your Mom’s Weezie Jefferson

I’d Rather Eat Fresh Heiny Chow

And I Ain’t Crazy About No God Damn Butthole No How

Batter Roll And Whip Ya Like A Fucken’ Kanoli

If Satan Had A Hockey Team Theni’d Be The Goalie

Cause We’re Dumber Than Driftwood Dumber Than Your Mama

Dumber Than A Supermodel Dumber Than Kwanza

Who’s The Knuckleheads?

We Are The Knuckleheads? [X4]

Bloodhound Gang One Way

Jimmy Pop’s Not Pooper Not A Pauper But A Popper

And I Got More Pop Than Orville Redenbacher

I Gots More Gravy Than The Whole Gravy Train

When I’m Kooky Going Loopy Like A Man Insane

I Won’t Be Around When The World Ends

So The Only Thing That I Recycle Is Your Girlfriend

Aww Back To The Side I Jump Up I Swing

When I’m Using Knockem’ Sockem’ Ya Know I’m Playing It To Win

The Nina The Pinta The Santa Maria

See You Later Salamander Cause I Wouldn’t Want To Be Ya

I’m A Chip I’m An Pringle Cause You Know I Gots The Flavor

Pop Me Up In Your Mouth Like I Was A Life Saver

I Ain’t Got No Soul But I Got More Than Don Henley

I’m Whiter Than Casper But I’m Not That Friendly

Marco Polo You Tried To Fly Solo

Make Your Thoughts Vocal I’ll Put Ya In A Choke Hold

One Way Or Another I’m Gonna Find Ya

I’m Gonna Getcha Getcha Getcha Getcha

One Way Or Another I’m Gonna Find Ya I’m Gonna Getcha I’ll Getcha

I’m A Gangster No I’m A Gangster Bitch

Your Momma Gave Me Head Yo Ur Girlie Gave Me The Itch

Scratch It Back The Bass Beats Fast Listen To The Shotgun Blast

In The Oven You’ll Get Burned Or In The Tank That You’ll Get Gassed

Fake-O Like Bacos Never Mistake Though

Showing Up Painted Up Fresh From Macco

Coming In On Stereo Rounder Than A Cheerio

Quick To Fill Your Fix And I’m Dizzier Than A Merry-Go

Rock This Obnoxious I’m Truly Not Nice

Cause I’m Blood Sucking Evil Like Muppets On Ice

Arriba Arriba I’m The Under Achiever

Gonna Leave It To Beaver I’m The Daydream Believer

I’m Like Mothra Man With My Big Wingspan

And Your The Mother Fucking Jap That Killed My Offspring Chan

I’m A Menace To Society Gonna Fill The Prophecy

First I’ll Drink Your Genesee And Then I’ll Take Your Liberty

One Way Or Another I’m Gonna Find Ya

I’m Gonna Getcha Getcha Getcha Getcha

One Way Or Another I’m Gonna Find Ya I’m Gonna Getcha I’ll Getcha

I’m A Tarantula In Your Chiquita

And When You’re Peeling Back The Skin I’m Gonna See Ya

I’m Gonna Bite Ya I’m Gonna Bite Ya

I’m Jimmy Pop I’ll Tell You Straight Up I Don’t Like You

Cause I’m Cold Kicking Lyrics Till The Day I Die

Many Fail To Copy At Least They Still Try

Busting Up Vocabulary Is What I Do Most

I’m Gonna Spread Your Legs Like Butter And Gobble Ya Up Like Toast

You Went For The Cherry You Went Bobbing For The Apple

But The Apple It Be Rotten And You Had To Eat The Scrappple

Scrapple? Pig Meat From A Pig Pen Hog Leftovers Your Girlfriend

Flex To The Effects And I Don’t Care What Nobody Thinks

Eating All You Sherbert And Dropping All Your Tiddiley Winks

Whoops Goes My Arm I Think It’s Outta Socket

Come Over Little Girlie I Got Some Candy In My Pocket

One Way Or Another I’m Gonna Find Ya

I’m Gonna Getcha Getcha Getcha Getcha

One Way Or Another I’m Gonna Find Ya I’m Gonna Getcha I’ll Getcha

Bloodhound Gang Pennsylvania

We are “cop rock” we are screech

We are z. cavaricci

We are laser removed

Tasmanian devil tattoos

We are third string we are puck

We are special people’s club

We are the half shirts with

Irreverent spring break top ten lists

We are munsoned we are squat

We are flashing twelve o’clock

We are spread out butt cheeks

Pulled apart so just the air leaks

We are “ishtar” we are tab

We are no right turn on red

We are the moustaches

The beatles grew when they dropped acid

You are the heart dotting “i”

In the word “apologize”

Scribbled drunk on a postcard

Sent from somewhere volcanoes are

I am the heart with no name

Airbrushed on the license plate

Of a subaru that was

Registered in pennsylvania

We are zima we are barf

We are cinderblock yard art

We are baldwin brothers

Not the good one but the others

We are amway we are shemp

We are sir david of brent

We are the queef after

A porn star breaks the gang bang record

You are the heart dotting “i”

In the word “apologize”

Scribbled drunk on a postcard

Sent from somewhere volcanoes are

I am the heart with no name

Airbrushed on the license plate

Of a subaru that was

Registered in pennsylvania

Do you even know what a wawa is girl?

Do you even know what a wawa is?

Do you even know what a wawa is girl?

Do you even know what a wawa is?

I’m in a state of p fuckin’ a

Bloodhound Gang Asleep At The Wheel

Bloodhounds shall cruise rendezvous

Break curfew new trip ensues

You never know Bloodhounds just go

Pack backpack up for down the road

No change of clothes but change for tolls

Pack of No-Doz Rolos and Skoal

Old Milwaukee Jolt black coffee

Sugar Daddy Rand McNally

A pack of jacks those orange Tic-Tacs

Glen Miller tracks roll of Kodak

The phantom black stacked Pontiac

Hot rod dual quads and in the back

Is the beat keeper big ass speaker

Jumbo woofer rattle tweeter

Dial is turned and there it’s stayin’

The next day where Stern is playin’

You got your Jesus on the dashbord but the devil’s under my hood

You’re taking it down legal I’m pullin’ it up to no good

God is your co-pilot I let Satan ride shotgun

You pay a toll to get to heaven but on the road to hell there’s none

You got your Jesus on the dashbord but the devil’s under my hood

You’re taking it down legal I’m pullin’ it up to no good

God is your co-pilot I let Satan ride shotgun

You pay a toll to get to heaven but on the road to hell there’s none

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

I-95 eight lanes wide

Midnight drive take a ride

Alongside east coast tide

Getting high so am I

Bloodshot red eyes from the fumes

I consume engine zoom then engine boom

Then enging glow erupt and blow

And overflow like volcano

So far to go can’t turn back though

Cheap tobacco cup of black Joe

Fuelin’ my body jumstartin’ my soul

Set my mind on cruise control

You got your Jesus on the dashbord but the devil’s under my hood

You’re taking it down legal I’m pullin’ it up to no good

God is your co-pilot I let Satan ride shotgun

You pay a toll to get to heaven but on the road to hell there’s none

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

24-7 Truck Stop Plaza

Turn off headlights turn on hazards

3 A.M. is when I gazed

Eyes glazed I’m dazed and then I fade

To black now were back

‘On The Road’ like Kerouac

Down the turnpike high rate of speed

Up all night like Gilbert Gottfried

You got your Jesus on the dashbord but the devil’s under my hood

You’re taking it down legal I’m pullin’ it up to no good

God is your co-pilot I let Satan ride shotgun

You pay a toll to get to heaven but on the road to hell there’s none

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel

Get up you’re asleep at the wheel.

Bloodhound Gang You’re pretty when I’m drunk

One Night Me And The Crew Hit The Road On A Mission

To Slurp Free Brew And Go Fuzzy Flounder Fishin’

Kayjees On The Hi-Fi And The Keg Was Bottomless

Until We Brought Skip O’ Pot2mus

And Daddy’s Gonna Get Some Probably Underage And Dumb

And Everybody Knows That The Daddy Eats His Young

Lupus In The Lavatory Making A Big Stink

Macing Up The Toilet Seat And Pooping In The Sink

M.S.G.¹S Tanked Up And Wizzin’ In A Cup

Waiting For A Sprinkle Genie To Come And Drink It Up

Cause I’m The One Bottle Willy With The 12 Horse Ale

After That I Get Silly Like Soupy Sales

Now It’s Midnight And I’m Completely Boofy Blitzed

A Six Of Shlitz And The Jew Brew Manischewitz

With My Beer-Tinted Glasses I’m Ready To Bitty Battle

I’m Hungry Like The Wolf But I’ll End Up Tending Cattle

Cause You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk

(You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk)

[X4]

(And I’m Pretty Fuckin’ Drunk)

Here She Comes, A Funky Fried Cutie

Mr. Jimmy Pop Ali Is Gonna Get Some Booty

Cause I’m Mr. Mcfeelie With A Speedy Delivery

You’d Think I Was A Ditch The Way This Chick Was Diggin’ Me

But Maybe I Should Check And See If This Is Where I Wanna Be

Hey Lupus Is She Cute? Yea For A Pygmie

Aw! What Do You Know? You’re Probably Going Home Alone

And It Wouldn’t Be The First Time That I Gave A Dog A Bone

Plus Beauty, It’s Only Skin Deep

It’s In The Eye Of The Beholder And My Beholder’s About To Tweak

I Could Tap That Barrel, In Fact I Know I Can

It’s A Ménagé A Trois You And Me And Heineken

Cause You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk

(You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk) [X4]

Regrets I’ve Had A Few

First And Foremost I’d Like To Mention You

For The Sake Of Conversation We’ll Call You The Brand New Heavy

Your A Mix Between An Ugnaut And Eugene Levy

You Can Call It Big-Boned, I Prefer To Call It Gut

Your Buddha Your Shamu Your Jabba The Fuckin’ Hutt

You Had Harpoon Scars And Your Boobies Were Hairy

I Smelt Tuna Melt But I Wasn¹T Gonna Worry

It Was 3 A.M. And I Wasn’t Gettin’ Squat

So I Rolled You Up In Flour And Aimed It For The Wet Spot

I Was Buttering Rolls Like A Soup Kitchen Christian

Then It Hit Me Something Bit Me While My Little Rod Was Fishin’

I Was Deep Sea Fishing I Took A Fat Chance

But How Was I Supposed To Know That Jabberjaws

Lived In Your Pants

At That Junction I Came To Realize

That Only Frank Purdue Likes Thighs That Size

Fatty Fatty Boom Ba Latty I Gotta Lament

That You Were Not A Girl You Were An Experiment

Cause You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk

(You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk)

You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk

And I’m pretty fucking drunk

Bloodhound Gang Coo Coo Ca Choo

Coo Coo Ca Choo Baby You That’s What You Are

You Are A Hollywood Star You’re The High Priestess By Far

And You Know This Tune’s For You We Call It Coo Coo Ca Choo

And It’s A Very Brief Description Of The Things We Could Do To You

You Were Looking At Me I Was Looking At You

Coo Coo Ca Choo Coo Coo Ca Choo

You Were Looking At Me I Was Looking At You

Coo Coo Ca Choo Now What Ya Gonna Do

Oil Me Up Quick Miss Daisy Before I’m Lubing Up Your Tailpipe

Or The Bedposts Will Be A Knocking And

A Knocking Til The Break Of Light

Raised And Dazed In A Million And One Ways

Like A Morton Coffee Roll I Want You Hot And Glazed

You’re Not The Real Thing Baby You’re Parkay You’re Not Butter

Gonna Have To Get You Home And Lube You Up With Fluff-N-Nutter

Scope It Scope It Baby Looking So Fit

Playing Games And Laying Dames You Know I Know You Know It

Quick To Get The Condom You Know The Jimmy Fits Too Snug

Lean You Against The Fire Place And Ride You On The Bear Skin Rug

Chow Down My Ding Dong Come And Sing Along

Slip A Grip Around My Tip And Then You’ll Be My Kling-On

Now In My Sweat Pants You’re Gonna See My Erection

Ooh Oh Pick A De Pop Pop Perfection

Umpla Dumpla Dippedee Do

Cause I’d Never Leave The House If Mommy Looked Like You

You Were Looking At Me I Was Looking At You

Coo Coo Ca Choo Coo Coo Ca Choo

You Were Looking At Me I Was Looking At You

Coo Coo Ca Choo Now What Ya Gonna Do

Butter Up Butter Cup Did Ya Really Think

It Would Really Last That Long

My Attention Span Hutches And When

You Wake Up You Know That I’ll Be Gone

Cocoa Butter Beach Blonde Wearing That Thin Thong

You Know I Got A Thing For You It’s Only An Inch Long

Picking Up Your Signals Like You’re A Tv Station

I’m Looking For The Channel To Have Immoral Applications

Looking So Fine Cosmo Behind

Fermentation Of Time Like Reunite Wine

Well I’m Bubbling Up And Steaming Like An Active Volcano

I Think I Clogged Up All Your Pipes Better Get Yourself Some Draino

I Get Annoyed Cause I Can’t Avoid

Baby Sounding Like A Mongoloid

I Gots The Skills To Keep Ya Busy All Night

If You Do Not Bite I Hope You Blow Like Dynamite

Happy Thanksgiving Would You Like A Little White Meat?

I¹Ll Stuff My Butterballs Then You Can Eat

You Were Looking At Me I Was Looking At You

Coo Coo Ca Choo Coo Coo Ca Choo

You Were Looking At Me I Was Looking At You

Coo Coo Ca Choo Now What Ya Gonna Do.

Bloodhound Gang Magna Cum Nada

Why try? I’m that guy

Holden Caulfield from “Catcher In The Rye”

Put away ’cause he wasn’t all there

Like a jigsaw puzzle you might compare

Me to him not a liver but wurst

Been much better off as a still birth

Big let down unparalleled

Like the last episode of “Seinfeld”

Or Jack Lemmon in “Glengarry Glen Ross”

Pepsi Challenge took it lost

Just fizzed out with my wires crossed

Buttons pushed but never went off

Like Martha I will self-destruct

The name’s Dunnstock it’s not Dumptruck

Just cursed as fuck with no such luck

My future plans include not much

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be

Nothin’ more than me

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be

Nothin’ more than me

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be

Nothin’ more than me

Always gonna be always gonna be always gonna always gonna be

Most likely to suck

Wanna be a Ghostbuster

First black President, owner of “Hustler”

Got shot down like Larry Flynt

Felt like shit like a bowel movement

Have you seen my will to live?

Because I seem to have lost it

Lovelife? No but Mom thinks I’m handsome

Couldn’t get off if I held a pimp for ransom

Feel like Jimmy Stewart no one sees my Harvey

Toxic Shock Syndrome gets more girls than me

Like Pee Wee Herman spermin’ I can

See the future in the palm of my hand

Psychic Friends, Network loser

Large phone bill in my very near future

Dealt nothing and bluffing hard

Playing poker with a joker and some Uno cards

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be

Nothin’ more than me

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be

Nothin’ more than me

Never gonna be never gonna be never gonna never gonna be

Nothin’ more than me

Always gonna be always gonna be always gonna always gonna be

Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck

Most likely to suck.

Bloodhound Gang Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby

Dog will hunt I’m the front end loader travoltin’ over so try my slam on for size

Drive stick with that kung-fu grip let the banana split and watch it go right to your thighs

Cop a feel Copperfield style abracadabra that bra do you think i can pull it off?

Wanna bang around? just jot me down on your to-do list under “put out like a fire” ’cause

I got somethin’ and it goes thumpin’ like this

All you need is my uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

I got somethin’ and it goes thumpin’ like this

All you need is my uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby

Edible strange how do i get in your pants when you’re tick tockin’ them

Serious levis? so tight can’t be classified that’s why I’m here to fill that opening

Make a seasoned pass to mount that ass and bob hope that i might one night stand a chance

Let’s go feng shui the fuck around my digs like a superball bring that sunny side up and

I got somethin’ and it goes thumpin’ like this

All you need is my uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

I got somethin’ and it goes thumpin’ like this

All you need is my uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

I got somethin’ and it goes thumpin’ like this

All you need is my uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

I got somethin’ and it goes thumpin’ like this

All you need is my uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss

Uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss baby uhn tiss uhn tiss uhn tiss